Insomniac's blog

I know everyone out there loves lists like David Lettermen's top ten, so here is my favorite top bumper stickers of all time list.

10. "Bad Cop, No Donut"
9. "My student beat up your honor roll student."
8. "Bush Sucks."
7. "Dyslexics untie!" (Actually a friend told me about this slogan and then I saw it on the back of someone's car a few days later.)
6. Just a picture of a witch's broomstick.
5. My own "Fueled by Buzz" coffee shop bumper sticker.
4. "Ain't skeered". And, apparently, ain't edumacated neither.
3. "BGSU, Bowling Green State University" stickers on SOMEONE'S car at GVSU (come on, you know I'm only picking on you!).
2. "Will Run Over Cats".
1. "Yes, this is my truck and No, I won't help you move".

Well, that's it. I hope you liked these too. Please leave me a comment with any more of these hee-hee moment bumper stickers.

Now that grades are safely in, I feel comfortable with releasing my new top profs list. I wanted to do this earlier, but I didn't want it to seem like I was trying to sway grades. So, without further ado, here is my most recently updated top profs list for GVSU:
My top few...
1. Dr. Matthew Daley, History Department. Doc Daley has a fanastically bizarre and hilarious sense of humor. For those of you who know me personally...he is sorta like a male version of myself. Cranked out on coffee, likes a good joke, and is slightly neurotic, but in a good way. He is also by far the most intelligent man I have ever had the fortune to meet, and yet, he is down-to-earth and not stuffy.

And tied for number one, but Doc Daley came out just a hair bit higher on my scale, is Dr. Curtis Richardson, History Department. Dr. CR is a phenomenal teacher. He is intelligent as all get out, fun, and is really a nice man. He is a bit quiet outside of the classroom, but he is truly one of the most well-rounded profs I have ever had.

2. Dr. Robert Rozema, English Department. What can I say about Rob? He so rocks. He has a true gift for teaching and uses a variety of methods to teach all students who end up in his class. I have only been in one of Rob's classes, but if I take more, he may just kick Doc Daley out of the numeral uno spot. I loved his sorta dry humor and his ability to deflect my snarky comments. Congrats, Rob, you are on the list.

I am continually amazed and impressed with these three gentlemen. Their balance of personality and professionalism mixed with humor and the ability to see students as more than just random faces taking up room in a class, has truly inspired me. Each has different teaching methods than the others on the list, and yet each is such an amazing teacher. Thank God GVSU has these profs around.

Holy crap! I just got a message from GVSU public safety telling me that it is time to order my parking permit for the fall and winter semesters. So, being a prompt person, I ordered my permit online so I can be ready for the fall. Anyhow, you know how much it costs now?! $250! That's right people, $250 for two semesters of parking. Now, I probably wouldn't be so pissed off if the university actually built more parking lots, but instead the univeristy seems to be taking more parking away! That isn't the only way GVSU pickpockets us students...
What about student life fees? I still don't really get how paying this fee has benefitted me.
Oh, and don't forget the charges for copying. I recently heard that GVSU is going to start charging us to print out our papers at the computer lab.
Then there is the interlibrary loan fees. This one I can understand. It does cost to ship books. And, it is a nominal fee that the student agrees to when he or she orders an ILL book.
I'm sure that there are scores of others "hidden" fees that we pay too. I'm just sick of being pickpocketed while I attend school.

That's it...I hereby submit my resignation for the position of Mom. Thank God I am starting Child Psychology on Monday. Maybe I will learn some new strategies for dealing with pubescent sarcasm and hormonal bi-polarism in 12 year old girls. I was just told by my wonderful child that I'm annoying and I think I am perfect all the time, then she informed me that I am not perfect. I sent her to her room. So, let's see...that's about five hours today she has spent in the confines of her room for mouthing off. One would think that eventually she would learn to keep her mouth shut. She is doing a lot of reading though, so maybe there is a plus side?
Yes, on Monday I start Child Psych. I hope I can learn some new methods rather than threatening to beat my children (disclaimer...it is always a threat, and never dealt out), throwing flip-flops at them while I am driving down the road (this I have done), and sending them packing to their rooms. Ah, and we all thought motherhood was going to be fun and love and, as one of my friends likes to say...sunshine and lollipops. HA! Motherhood is 95% work and 2% fun. The other three percent is laundry, which is a mindless task that I so enjoy.
Seriously though. My 12 year old can be so much fun sometimes. She is funny, book-smart, lacks almost all commonsense, kind, and compassionate (although I rarely see this part of her personality directed at me). Oh well. No one ever said motherhood was easy. Actually the only piece of advice I got about parenting when I was pregnant was, "Being a parent isn't just 18 years. It is for a lifetime". Well I am signed up for a lifetime and even if today sucked for motherhood, I am still grateful for my children. I am blessed even on the bad days.

I did something tonight that I normally don't do...I watched a movie. I watched Hitch just for fun. I loved Hitch's advice on dating. Women have always been difficult creatures to figure out. I'm not all that feminine, but even I am a little girlie-ish sometimes. There is one thing that men do that I love. I love to be complimented. But, there is a fine art to complimenting women. So, in the true manner of the movie, here's my rules for complimenting women:

1. Say what you mean...to a certain extent. If you think she has beautiful hair, teeth, smile, eyes, please say just that. "You have beautiful eyes." Simple, direct, and to the point. However, if you think she has the biggest breasts you have ever seen, please do not say that to her. I guess what I am saying is that discretion is important in a compliment.

2. Don't wait for the "right" moment for a compliment. Say it when you think it, but always keep rule one in mind.

3. Don't draw it out. Don't try to add to your compliment. It will seem false then.

4. It does not have to be Shakespearean. Please do not say, "Your lips are like roses". Ewhhh. Yuck.

5. Compliments are a little like Ex-lax. Too many in a short time will cause problems. Limit yourself to one or two simple compliments over the space of a few days. It will keep her thinking, "What did he mean by that"? And, it will make her desire to hear more. But, if you compliment too much it will seem either false or make her so suspicious when you don't compliment her.

6. Don't expect a compliment in return. Don't allow her to wait awkwardly while she searches for something nice to say back. Get the conversation rolling again. She'll compliment you in due time.

7. Act nonchalant. A compliment is not a declaration of love.

8. You know she will like the compliment if she gives you a little longer look and a slight smile. Again, act nonchalant.

Guys, try this out if you have an awkward time complimenting women. Oh, also watch Hitch for a little more advice. And my women friends out there...tell me I'm not wrong on these rules...

Yes, this is still Anita's Insomniac's Blog. I decided since it is summer I would go with something a little more summery for a design. Hope y'all like it.

Oh Yes! I am officially on vacation...at least for the afternoon. School is out and I am doing pretty well on my grades thus far. I think I will celebrate by eating a balanced lunch (no, I don't mean ordering fries and a shake to go with my cheeseburger), pet my puppy-wuppy-woo, and take a nap. Boy, I sure have gotten old. I just got home from school and the air-conditioning feels great, no one is home, and I have food in the frig. Ah, life is good my friends. Tonight I start revisions on my history paper that I am submitting for a paper prize. I might try to squeeze a movie in there too. Hee hee. It is great to determine my own agenda for a few days. I have classes starting up again on Monday, so for a short time I can be master of my own destiny. I hope all you 311ers enjoy your summer, and yes, I plan on keeping my blog up for quite some time.

Hee hee. Tonight I read a little book, essay really, that I picked up for a friend. It is titled "On Bullshit" by Harry G. Frankfurt, professor of philosophy Emeritus at Princeton. Absolutely hilarious, in an intellectual sort of way. By the end of the book, you can't help but think, "Was this whole book just bullshit"? In the book, Professor Frankfurt tries to distinguish bullshit from lying. My favorite qoutation:
"...a person who undertakes to bullshit his way through has much more freedom. His focus is panoramic rather than particular."
Check it out. I thought it was pretty darn funny, and that's no bullshit.

Pulling an all-nighter in an attempt to get my pet-a-doggy (thanks Becky for the name) project done. The computer keyboard is starting to play tricks on me. The letters keep jumping to different keys. Hold still damn it!
I got home from grocery shopping at 11:45 PM. Had to go...no food and my stomach was beginning to eat my spine. It is not good to survive from 7 in the morning to 7 at night on only a small baggy of nilla wafers and two large cups of coffee. I did try to drink some water though. One good thing, I think I am losing more weight.
I think I got everything set for my pet-a-doggy. I have to print it out yet and assemble it but at least it is all written down. I hope I do well on it. I have never had to do anything like this for my other classes, even those in the ed program, so I hope I didn't screw up too bad. The ed classes are such a waste of time. Who would have thought that I learned more about being a teacher from an English course than from my ed courses?!
Anyhow, enough of my random bitching. I think I am off to bed. Sleep is good...

Yes my GVSU friends...
The first six weeks of summer classes are almost finished. Collective sigh. And best of all? Our grades have to be in by Monday. For some reason the end of this six weeks is almost as good as sex for me. (Sorry, I can't help but be honest.) I feel like kicking back with a Southern Comfort and Coke and smoking a leisurely cigarette. Life is good...at least until Monday.
Yes, on Monday classes start up again. I am one of the fortunate ones who gets to attend the second six weeks. I love it when my friends see me and ask how my summer vacation is going. Ha! What summer vacation!? Honestly though, I do love summer classes. And, since my fellow 311ers like top ten lists so much, here is my top ten for taking summer classes...

10. Michigan beaches are nasty dirty places. They clean the classrooms every week. Why would you want to be at the beach when you could be in class?
9. I'm going for the pastey white girl look.
8. You can go barefoot in class.
7. I enjoy lugging around a 50 pound backpack in 90 degree weather. It is great exercise.
6. Professors are much more laid back. Hell, you can even call some by their first names!
5. If you really hate a class, you only have to survive for six weeks!
4. I like seeing kids under 15 on campus.
3. I love to pretend to be in a tour group to get free food for potential freshmen.
2. You never have to what in line for a computer at Henry Hall.
1. There is ample (and close!) parking.

Well, I hope everyone enjoys their summer, break or no break. I know that I for one will enjoy the 2.35 days I will have off.